tabularasa
@tabularasa
Joined almost 4 years ago@tabularasa
Joined almost 4 years agoI have only recently heard about aphantasia and still not quite sure what people mean by "mind's eye". It's difficult for me to comprehend that people can "see" things without hallucinogens. To add to your data points, I was beaten fairly regularly if not often (3-5 times a month) from the ages of 5-14yrs old. These were generally multiple strikes with a belt to the legs and back (without shirt or pants). Welts, bruising and occasional bleeding were the results especially when the buckle side of the belt was used. Some beatings were worse and more sustained. There were also non-corporal punishments including standing and facing the wall for an hour, holding arms out for extended periods, standing in underwear, etc.. I suspect the beatings had less effect than some of the other experiences. E.g., when I informed that I had played Dungeons & Dragons with some friends from school, the reaction was anger. During D&D sessions, one person is the "Dungeon Master" (DM) whose job is to tell the story to the players and run the adveture. When I explained that the DM describes the scene to the players, it was met with incredulity. "How can you actually *see* this Dungeon Master. It must mean that this game is already affecting your mind." There was sustained anger when I expressed my desire to be a writer. The response was an immediate, "You *ing coward. Don't you bring that up again." I recall similar reaction to drawing, painting and even reading. This may be the salient point of this post: I was a voracious reader during my childhood, particularly of science fiction and fantasy novels. I recall having a vivid imagination and picturing myself on other worlds quite often. At one point my books were all confiscated and locked away or thrown out. This was accompanied by beatings and other punishment. My suspicion is that I lost the ability to picture images around this time but I cannot be certain. I hope these anecdotes are helpful in your research.