Isabel Storey

"ancient history. Over and done with it." To me, this means you are living in the only reality which is NOW, the present moment. If we need to account for past events then evidence can be found in recalling abstract stuff like dates, places, times. Memory is a marvellous thing and has the capacity to store as much and more information we need to survive and thrive.

I have never been diagnosed with agrophobia but I very much prefer my own company and life as a recluse has been and remains a benefit during COVID. Crowds are my idea of hell and I would never put myself in a situation - so I have never marched, rallied, been caught up in a mob. Has to be something really special to think of going to the theatre. Tinitus is a pain which I manage to mask by accepting enjoyable/encouraging earworms

We learn our way in the world by coping with what actually IS rather than what we imagine it should be. There is nothing wrong in being different - if only folk could understand we are ALL different in some way and just accept that as a fact and get on with it as best we can with the tools we have and the cards life deals us.

I am coming around to the idea that 'aphantasia' is another word for illusionism. I was part of a PhD's study group testing tendency to perceive illusions and was one of a small group who do not perceive even the most commonly accepted illusions. In other words we see things as they truly are. I am also a published writer and now wish I had never heard of aphantasia asit now seems to be regarded as some form of mental deficiency rather than just plain different with benefits.

Very vivid, detailed dreams. So often almost precognitive. Also worth pondering for whatever message being sent from subconscious.

Similar. It took a fellow writer to point out that I never described anyone - this evoked howls of disagreement from others in the group as each had formed an image. I regarded the capacity to elicit images in the minds of others as a gift. Now I know it to be aphantasia I have stopped writing! But recently started an epic poem - but who reads those these days?

Advantages? All of the above. Other than the Masters. My major advantage (in retrospect) was a lack of education. According to my well educated son, I would not have experienced many facets of mania during a long learning through psychosis. I could locate through triangulated sensations in my face, discover the lost, know which bet to place (temporary). Before I went off the rails of normal life I experienced a powerful dream during which I was guided around a huge round table filled with inscriptions representing all of man's beliefs; that I would be loaned many gifts so I understood the experience but my gift was to translate the ineffable. (Looking back was I labelling myself an oxymoron?) I knew my experiences all had a basis in the electro-magnetic field but I had not the education in physics to explain.  Reading below - seems I have already responded but with less self exposure.  Summing up: the lack of formal education set me on different paths. Arrived wearing Cassandra's shoes.

Use sound and hearing? During my BA I found it helpful to read aloud every word, recording and playing it back helped even more. Warning: on a crucial assignment I found I was better informed on the author's words than the lecturer setting the assignment who had overlaid with his own interpretation. I made the mistake of correcting the assumption he had made - not done as an undergraduate.

This question took me down a rabbit hole! Locally available at seemingly an affordable fee. I could not find a link to the article you reference. Might tell me more that Google? However! I do know about self-induced psychosis without taking drugs. Cheaper & safer? Back in the day when extended lack of sleep + stress + walking would induce a manic episode I discovered my visual imagination through hallucination at several levels. First an overall hallucination that I was living in another universe which seemed normal for a tribal human being sharing group mind set; next an occasional image as picture of place yet to be arrived at. So hallucinations had a precognitive element which led me through life day by day through some extraordinary and extrasensory perceptions.   I so loved being in that space the coming back to reality was my Judas betraying my Christ (as it were) in order to live an ordinary life. Since then I had an occasion to seek hypnotherapy which was refused on the basis that I may not wish to return to this everyday consciousness. Of the replies below I find Patrick Lothrop's response very interesting. So, Mihnea you can choose to travel one of three paths - drug induced, self induced or just take each day as it comes and be glad of it.  

Opened several Google tabs to familiarise myself with this as I had never heard of it. Seems primarily directed towards dyslexia. Only one tangential reference to visual imagery. Perhaps did not go deep enough to find word 'aphantasic' or perhaps it is not there anyway. I would very much doubt any claim to develop visual imagery in people who don't have it at all. Classing something as 'underdeveloped' is a marketing strategy. Meditation would assist at far less $$$. I am an ancient cynic averse to almost everything American especially when it comes to promoting stuff volunteers in Australia do for free. (Read Write for adult literacy.)  

Instead of attempting to visualise, have you tried using hearing? Record that which you need to remember - that uses voice then ear - after which play recording while walking/ running and sync item with each step. (As a child, had skipping games to remember complex spellings. List maker? Put list close to where it will be needed. Full use of calendar which syncs between devices.

I think your empathy comes from an abstract understanding of the source of the others emotional state. I can relate. Early training led me to treat others as I would want to be treated so, if in xyz situation I would want abc, then that would be my response. Most often it works out well, but not always! I had a mother-in-law whom I would not shame by deep cleaning that more which I would be ashamed to leave to discover she would rather I had done the deep cleaning:). These days, while I keep the notion of 'doing as one would be done by' close, I tend to ask first if this that or the other would be of any help. Why try to 'visualise' someone else's experience? It is impossible. The experience belongs to them. what belongs to the by-stander is the effect or consequence of the experience and it is this which elicits empathy. Remember that, at some stage, everything goes through the brain as it receives and responds to reports from within the body. When responding to a situation/person requiring empathy, the brain is being economical with energy by responding as you describe. It would be both a waste and a dishonest effort for your brain to attempt an emotional response to create empathy. The energy and effort in an emotional response is best reserved for situations when you are in need of empathy from another.  Once I had a lot to say until I learned what not to say in order not to give offence to avoid  battering against the fence of deeply held belief. So it was with relief that I broke the habit and no longer grabbed at conversation. Then I found it all too quiet and decided to break the verbal diet the initial obstacle to cross was the discovery of total loss of patterned words for conversation and worse, I found in consternation were the same trite truths from predicted angle the same nowhere threads left in the air to dangle silently. So to silence I again retired serene in knowledge late acquired of a truth never heard but often told that speech is silver, silence gold. Wrapped in the knowledge I now find conversation from mind to mind more accurately expressed by touch as hands and kisses dies lie - as much - as words.

So sad you always felt you were stupid. You are NOT less of yourself! difference is not detriment. There are positives to not wasting mental energy in postulating one's future life/well-being/whatever in creating what others call their 'dreams' which are ACTUALLY wishful thinking fantasies liable to disruption/destruction when confronted with a reality over which they have no control. Far better to work on reality as it presents itself without having to cope with the disappointment of destroyed dreams. As for intelligence: I am lucky to be of a generation when we had weekly tests at school and were placed in the classroom according to our results. Although never top, I was always within the top group sitting at the back of the class. A teacher told me I had missed a scholarship place to prestigious high school by one point, hoping i would not be disappointed. I knew my parents would take the money instead so accepted the result. Early twenties, babysitters, arranged I sit a MENSA test. 136 so not Mensa material. Mid-forties, sent by psychiatrist to psychologist for assessment prior to individual therapy. My memory enabled successive backward repetitions of nine numbers before he stopped asking me. At same session when told to place images in order to create a story I asked which of the two stories to be told this the first time anyone had told him two stories from same set of images. Later, in a very roundabout way (nurse bragging to a friend of mine) my score in adult WAIS was 170 = genius. No-one has said so to my face and in fact my eldest son (whose IQ is with top 2%) told me that test is rather soft. So? I don't know. But if I am, it is down to an exceptional memory - not visual as such, but I can place people/conversations way back in time with a degree that has been embarrassing for some! Best keep my mouth shut?  As for feeling less than who one is? No way! Different yes. Like from another (and better) planet? Yes. Less emotionally involved? Yes. But not lacking empathy sourced from abstract understanding of suffering. Can I guess? Are you good in crisis situations? Jump in instinctively knowing what to do because your brain is focused on the reality of the moment and not cluttered from coping with the shock of unmet expectations? As for not recalling meeting someone for the first time - so what? When you next meet that is because they will be worth remembering? 

I share the reading and writing experience of descriptions. Waste of space when reading and did not realise I did not in my writing until (many years ago) a writing group member pointed out what she saw as my difference. "You never describe anyone." The rest of the group protested as each had visualised my characters and, interestingly, each were different. I took that as having the knack of eliciting visions in the minds of others and regarded that as a gift. I create images from my abstract imagination and other see whatever it is they see: Those of you aboard my ship prepare yourselves for a long, long trip. Do not grumble as we pass the shore. This is what I ask you be thankful for the rescue as I sail the seven seas forevermore.   Settle in for a long, long ride. Your fare is paid with all your pride. Know the measure of the ticket you have bought. Travel now in peace or your journey will not cease and do not leave this ship before your port.   When you sit down at my table teach me all that you are able add your store of knowledge to my hoard. My ship is called "The Comet", I shall live my life upon it Only through learning am I never bored.   Once I sailed this ship alone searching for my final home then was told that this was not to be. Now I understand the message, I carry those who need a passage, Devil's refugees on a rescued Destiny.   Those who were stolen, snared or sold can throw their cargo in my hold as they jump from the dark side of the moon. I keep a peaceful ship for the quarrelsome soon slip on decks holystoned to Heaven's tune.   There will be times you are afraid and think mistake has been made as I steer into the dark of darkest awe, but in all worlds must be seen, my lanterns red and green as I sail the seven seas forevermore.

A belief in god does not involve imaging any form of figure. Sufficient is the belief that god is the collective  energy in all that is alive enhanced by an experience of being in touch with/infused with that energy. It has nothing to do with logical thinking, but a belief in something outside of the thinking self. If one has not  (yet) experienced such transcendence there is no path to understanding unless/until surrendering self to something greater. Once having experienced it would be difficult to remain an atheist while being an agnostic leaves what happens 'next' unanswered. Having said that, I have had precognitive experience of my son's death, an out-of-body experience on my grandfather's death, several conversations with my deceased mother and, during a prolonged postnatal psychotic episode (and since) where I visually dream of hints of forthcoming events.  The long and short of it is, none know and within a 'scientific' paradigm will never KNOW.  Recent revelation I am aphantasic has me no longer writing, crippled by now knowing other authors have a gift of seeing scenes! Also am so annoyed now realising that much of my misunderstandings with others has been based on their not realising I am 'blind' to and not truly sharing their daily experiences. No wonder I feel or am treated as alien. But on that thought, probably the inherent motivation to seek a sense of belonging to a realm beyond everyday 'reality'? It pisses me off that others do not have to keep removing/moving furniture to find the best place both visually and functionally. Big sigh. Recommend study Spinoza

Further, - just remembered - consulted a specialist hypnotherapist to assist in overcoming a projection problem from psychotherapy. As I had enjoyed wonderful states during a psychotic (postnatal) episode, he went off, had a word with someone else, returning to tell me that hypnosis would not be a good idea as there could be a strong reluctance to return from trance. There is a beautiful world out there, Big sigh. 

I have had two people attempt to hypnotise me, to be told I am not a suitable subject. Once I found myself attempting to solve a problem by throwing my mind to a cobweb in the corner of a high ceiling and had the sensation of leaving my body - my feet became level with my chest and I realised I was putting myself into a trance but worried that if "I" was 'out there' how would I bring myself back in, so I pulled myself down into my body. Went round the room touching cutlery, furniture, walls as everything felt so alien. Was told I would have 'come back' by myself but that being in a mental hospital at the time was probably not the best place for such an experiment?

Full, vivid. plot, characters. But as soon as I roll over the whole lot disappears unless I make serious effort to remember details. Often finding my way from one point to another over terrain which has changed over time. Used to be mountainous bush tracks until bulldozed and opened up ease of travel. For many years, while itinerant and to some extent while stationary, many dreams turn out to be precognitive in that the morning will bring options and my waking steps chooses to follow one of these. No longer experience deja vu but have the sense of being in the right place at the right time. Meeting for the first time someone met in a dream takes a bit of explaining unless quite comfortable with Jung and collective unconscious.

All of the above to which I add: Abstract thinking with the ability to take on big ideas, join unseen dots, conceptual leaps. 

I was SO annoyed to find people can actually plan their lives in a series of visual steps to achievements with a reasonable expectation of success. I have always gone with the flow - taught by my mother to 'meander' not 'wander". Now at 82 trying not to work out what I could have done/been with the capacity to envisage the future. But then, I think I have gone along with whatever the Universe or Whomsoever deigned. And at the end of the day, will it matter?